FMA Truth or Dare
by Writing Alchemist
Summary: What happens when Winry, Ed, Al, and Hughes get bored? Winry gets ideas! semi abandonedi plan on going back and rewriting this...just not soon.
1. Chapter 1

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare"

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters.

(Winry, Ed, Al, and Hughes sit around a kitchen table being bored)

Ed: I'm bored. Damn it! (bangs fist on table)

Al: Niisan! Please try to control your temper.

Ed: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

Winry: Ed! Stop yelling at your brother! We're all bored. (twirls wrench idly)

Hughes: Yes, yes! Listen to the young lady who's almost as beautiful as my Elisa. Oh! I have an idea—

Ed and Winry: What is it?

Hughes: (pulls stack of photo albums out of nowhere) We can look at pictures of my precious Elysia! She's so—

Ed, Winry, and Al: NO! (jump back from table)

Hughes: But—

Ed: (claps hands together) No. (places hands on photo albums) (flash of blue light—photo albums are now a pile of film)

Hughes: GAAH! My beloved pictures! (cries)

Ed: Will you shut the hell up? No damned photos! _Where did they come from anyways?_

Winry steps forward brandishing wrench.

Winry: I have an idea. Let's play a game.

Ed: (being stubborn) Alchemists don't play games.

Al: Nissan! That's not true. You and I play card games all the time. Let's play Winry's game.

Ed: (still being stubborn) No.

Al: But niisan!

Ed: Fine! I'll play! Just stop whining!


	2. Chapter 2

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare" Ch.2

Winry: (jumps up and down) YAY! (does happy dance with wrench)

Ed: Okay, okay. Just calm down and tell us what the game is.

Al: Yes. Please tell us, Winry.

Winry: The game is called Truth or Dare.

Al: Truth or Dare? I've never played that before. How do you play?

Ed: Yes you have, Al. You were still though. You must not remember.

Al: Oh (looks downcast)

Winry: Well anyways, this is how you play… (explains how to play)

Al: Okay, I got it. Let's start. Winry should start since it's her idea.

Winry: Alright. Let's see. (looks around table slyly) Ed! Truth or dare?

Ed: _I'm not afraid of her._ Fine, dare.

Winry: Okay, I dare you to…(thinks hard) I dare you to say "I am short" 10 times.

Ed: _That girl..._ (glares at Winry)

Winry: Come on! We're waiting! (grins innocently)

Ed: Fine…iamshortiamshortiamshortiamshortiamshortiamshortiamshortiamshortiamshort

iamshort. (glares at Winry again)

Winry: Okay, Ed. It's your turn.

Ed: Alright. Hughes, truth or dare?


	3. Chapter 3

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare" Ch.3

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters.

Hughes: Dare.

Ed: Okay, I dare you to go outside and walk 'til you find a woman and then stop and ask her "Will you bare my child?" Then come back and tell us what she says and does.

Author's note: Sorry, I was just reading Inu Yasha.

Hughes: WHAAA? But-buy I'm married!

Ed: (evil grin) Well sucks to be you if Glacier finds out. Go! You gotta do it. (trying to contain himself)

Winry and Al: Oo

Hughes: (gets up and goes out the front door) _What did I ever do to him? I'm sorry Glacier-san…_

Winry: Ed! That was sick!

Ed: Well maybe he won't show me any more stupid pictures of Elysia after this. That's what he gets for annoying me with those damned photos!

Al: Hmmm…you do have a point.

(door bell rings)

Winry: (yells at top of voice) COME IN!

(Roy and Risa Hawkeye walk in)

Al and Winry: Hello Lieutenant Colonel. Hello Lieutenant Hawkeye.

Ed: (glares suspiciously at Roy) What do you want now? I thought I had a day off from you sarcasm.

Roy: We just thought we'd stop by. No letter to answer this time though. So what are you kid's doing? (pulls up a chair)

(Risa sits too)

Al: We are playing Truth or Dare. You wanna play?

Risa: Sure.

Roy: No.

Ed: Oh, come on, Mustang. You scared? (raises eyebrows)

Roy: No. I just don't have time for childish games.

Winry: Ed, I thought you didn't want to play.

Ed: (glares at Winry) Shut up.

Al: You have to play. Why else would Boo-san put you in this story?

Everyone except Hughes and Al: Who the hell is Boo-san?

Al: (whispers) She's the Author.

Everyone except Hughes and Al: Ooooh…

Ed: (looks up at ceiling warily) That's a little disturbing.

Winry: Okay, let's get started again. Why isn't Hughes back yet?

(Hughes walks in front door with black eye and swollen face)

Winry: Oh! Okay, we're all here now.

Hughes: Ed…you-ow! You suck. (collapses into chair)

Al: It's your turn Hughes-san.

Roy: What the hell happened to you?

Risa: (raises eyebrow) Looks like he was being perverted to a random woman he met on the street.

Ed: (grins innocently but proudly) Exactly. So Hughes, what did she say? We can already see what she did.

Roy: What the hell is going on? (utterly confused)

Hughes: She said…

(door bell rings)


	4. Chapter 4

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare" Ch.4

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters.

Winry: (yells at front door) GET YOUR BUTT IN HERE SO WE CAN GO ON WITH THE STORY!

(door opens slowly and Havoc peeks in)

Havoc: Eeep! (cigarette falls out of mouth)

Al, Ed, Roy, Risa, and Hughes: Oo

Roy: Sit down Havoc, Hughes was just about to explain his discovery of what happens when you be perverted to a random woman on the street.

(Havoc sits down slowly as far away from Winry as possible)

Hughes: Well, as I was saying. She said "What the?" and smacked me. Then yelled "Who do you think you are?" and beat me up.

Al: You were gone quite a while.

Hughes: I was unconscious.

Havoc: (lights new cigarette) Why the hell would you, of all married men with children, be perverted to any woman other than your wife? I mean really! Your obsessed with your family.

Ed: (stands and bows) Thank you, thank you. You are all too kind.

Risa: We are playing truth or dare. Come on, Hughes it's your turn.

Hughes: Okay, let's see. Hmmm…(rubs ching thoughtfully) Roy, truth or dare?

Roy: Truth.

Hughes: Have you ever kisses any woman, at any point in your life, who is not related to you? And who?

Roy: I refuse to answer that, (folds arms)

Havoc: (snickers) Oh, go on Mustang! You gotta answer.

Ed: (sits up straighter in his chair and listens attentively) Heh. I bet the answer's no.

Roy: (stands up angrily holding out his rihg tarm ready to snap his fingers) Of course I have you miniature poodle! You're so small that if I didn't know you, I'd think that you were too young to even know what a kiss is!

Ed: What? (also stands up, knocking over his chair) Who did you call a puppy so tiny that it hold the record for the smallest runt in the history of dog breeding?

Author's note: Roy calls Ed a "miniature poodle" because he's short and hes a "dog of the military" you get it? hehe.

(Al, Winry, Havoc, Risa, and Hughes are all cowering back)

Al: He didn't go that far, Niisan.

Ed: (ignoring Al) Well then who was it, you self-centered Shitzu

Roy: …--

Winry: Alright! Break it up. Ed sit down before I knock you out with my wrench. (brandishes wrench under Ed's nose) And Roy just tell us already so we can move on.

Roy: (coughs nervously and wispers somehting)

Havoc: What was that? Sheak up, we cant hear you.

Roy: (grunts something unrecognizable)

Ed: Huh? (raises eyebrows) Come on Mustang, stop actign like the monkey you are.

Roy: RISA! Damn it! ITS RISA! (bangs head on table and keeps it there)

(Risa blushes)


	5. Chapter 5

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare" Ch.5

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters.

Author's Note: Sorry for not updating in a while guys, been real busy with school and stuff. Well here it is…enjoy!

Ed: Ha! I knew it! I knew there was something going on between you two! (triumphant smile)

Havoc: I already knew

Roy: What? (startled into sitting up)

(everyone stares at Havoc)

Havoc: I was looking for you one time to give you a message and found you and Risa making out in your office. The door wasn't all the way closed. I just decided (lights another cigarette) to leave you two to it and give you the message later. You're lucky I got over you stealing my girlfriend or else it would have been all over the East Head Quarters.

Risa: Why you little- (pulls out gun)

Havoc: GAH! (ducks under table)

(megaphone appears floating in midair with a loud pop)

Megaphone: (threatening girl's voice) Risa Hawkeye put the gun down!

Risa: Who-who re you?

Megaphone: I'm Boo-san, The Author. Put the gun down. I forbid you to shoot anyone!

Risa: (small voice) Okay. (puts gun away)

Megaphone: Now. Go on. (disappears in red smoke)

Everyone: …

Winry: Ummm…Okay, Roy. It's your turn.

Roy: Oh, yeah. Havoc, Truth or Dare?

Havoc: Dare.

Roy: Okay, I dare you to talk all your cigarettes and burn them with a gas mask on.

Havoc: You're mad!

Al: Do cigarettes explode?

Winry: I don't think so.

Al: I know opium does.

Winry: Well cigarettes are not made of opium.

Havoc: But where am I gunna get a gas mask?

Ed: (goes into random closet and comes out with some random objects) Here. (claps hands and places them on objects. 7 gas masks appear) There's one for each of us. I personally don't wanna breath in that crap.

(everyone takes a gas mask and watches Havoc talk out 2 packs of cigarettes)

Roy: Hughes, pat him down. Make sure he's not hiding any.

(Hughes commences with the patting down of Havoc)

Hughes: Ha! (pulls out a pack strapped to Havoc's ankle)

Havoc: Hey! That's my spare emergency pack!

Roy: Okay, everyone. Gas masks on. Well, Al, umm…you don't really need one.

Havoc: (whimpers) Roy. Will you do it please? I can't bear it!

Roy: No. You do it. It'll be good for you. And don't you dare take that mask off.

Havoc: Okay, fine. (takes out lighter and burns cigarettes) Good bye, my love! Until we meet again.

(cigarettes burn)

Ed: Oooo…pretty colors. (stares at flames)

Winry: Ed? (raises eyebrows) is your mask on too tight?


	6. Chapter 6

FMA fan fiction "Truth or Dare" Ch.6

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters.

Author's Note: Sorry for not updating in a while guys, I AM the biggest procrastinator in the world and then when I finally got this chapter written and typed my internet was being screwy and not letting me do anything but its fixed now…so yea here ya go…

(Hughes disposes of burned cigarettes and everyone takes off their masks)

Havoc: Alright, my turn. Winry! Truth or dare?

Winry: Dare.

Ed: Ooooo!

Winry: Shut up, Edward.

Havoc: Okay, Winry, I dare you to wear Al for a whole hour.

Winry and Al: WHAT!

Al: GAAAH! Not again. That's so weird.

Winry: That IS weird. Really, really weird.

Ed: Haha!

Winry: Shut UP, Ed! (gets up and walks over to Al) Sorry, Al, but yea. (climbs inside)

Havoc: (glances at clock) Okay, hour starts…now.

Al: This is so odd.

Winry: Yeah. It's a little stuffy in here too. (pause) Ed, truth or dare?

Ed: Again?

Winry: Are there any other Eds in here?

Ed: -- No. Dare.

Winry: I dare you to drink…(menacing voice) a glass of…MILK!

Al: (gasp)

Roy: (raises eyebrows)

Riza: (giggles)

Hughes: (chuckles)

Havoc: (is lost)

Ed: You wouldn't dare!

Winry: No…but you would. Hahahaha!

Ed: NOOOOOO!

Hughes: (pulls out glass of milk) Here!

Winry, Al, Ed, Roy, Riza: _Where did he get that?_ Oo

Havoc: _ I'm so lost…Wait, where did Hughes get that glass of milk?_ Oo

Ed: NOOO! You can't make me! I'll never give in!

Winry: (evil cackle and storm clouds) Oh yes you will.

Al: Winry, I don't think you should do that thing with the storm clouds again. What if I get stuck by lightning? I'm metal you know.

Winry: Oh okay. (clams down) Ed…drink the milk. NOW! (scream echos inside Al) Oooohh. My ears, my ears (completely subdued) That hurt.

Riza: Oh, come on, Edward. It's just a glass of milk.

Hughes: Ed, please just drink the milk. It won't kill you (pushes milk towards Ed)

Ed: (stares at milk warily and cringes back)…Eeeeeeww.

Winry: Just drink it already! (Al's head lifts up and a wrench shoots out at Ed's head)

Ed: (ducks and grabs milk) Okay, okay! (grimaces) Here it goes. (drinks milk)

(everyone is anxiously waiting for the result)

(Ed's eyes slide out of focus and he falls out of his chair)

Everyone but Roy: ED!

Roy: (gets up and looks down at Ed lying on the floor) He passed out. -- Weak little brat.

(Ed's eyes snap open and he quickly jumps to his feet)

Ed: Who are you calling ultra tiny?

Riza: Yet again, Edward, he didn't go that far.

Ed: (glares at Riza and Roy) My head is spinning (collapses into chair) I feel like I'm gunna throw up. Uuuugh, Damn it.


End file.
